I’m not a big “resolution maker”.
Despite this little factoid, for the past few years I have attempted to make a small personal resolution to spend a little bit of time and attempt to blog at least once a month. Looking over the statistics from past three years I do believe a shifty enough high price attorney could almost argue that I have kept my “resolution”.
The truth of the matter is I “used to” enjoy blogging. Well, perhaps that statement came out the wrong way – I think I still like blogging, but if I am to be completely honest - I’m not sure if I still do because it is a struggle to find the time to blog more than half a dozen times a year.
I often ask myself why I struggle at this if I enjoy it so much. I can come up with several reasons. One of the reasons that keeps reoccurring has to do with the theme of the blog. “Life as a father of five”. Let’s just look at the five for a moment here. #1 of 5 is 28 years old. TWENTY EIGHT YEARS OLD!! (When and how did that happen??) #2 of 5 is 21 years old, and #3 of 5 is 20 years old. These three have crossed over the threshold, and is (in at least one case) well into their “adult” years. (Yes, the word “adult” is in quotation marks. I’ll leave that sitting there, and let you decipher the symbolism and implication behind that all on your own! Bwa ha ha ha!!) #4 of 5 and #5 of 5 are still “dependents” (at least for the purposes of tax preparation), being 16 and 12 years old, respectively. Over the ten(+) years of “life as a father of five”, there is so very little that has not already been addressed, or that either I, the Mother of Five, or one of the miscellaneous five kids do not want publicly discussed. Coming up with new content, or content that I find motivational is challenging.
I’m not sure what this all means. I miss blogging as a creative outlet. Goodness knows, when it comes to the “creativity” genes – my very talented, artistic, and musical gifted sister was the lucky recipient. Still, I crave a creative outlet. I probably should not give up on blogging. I have enjoyed it, and often times found it quite therapeutic. I have made numerous friends. There is a bunch of family history here (much of which puts a smile upon my face).
Currently, there is no means to forecast what the future holds for me either. My life as a father (of five), and Father of Five (the “dot com”) are both still a work in progress. There will (undoubtedly) be more stories to share, more thoughts to expound, and more updates to share as “The Father of Five” – but given the parameters I have painted myself into, I find the ease at which I have been able to “create” is becoming ever more elusive.
I will continue upon my “resolution quest” to keep breathing bits of life into the Father of Five. Updates will (in all likelihood) be sporadic, but hopefully enough to keep me interested (aka “once a month”?). In the meantime I will also be contemplating a “secondary” (or, maybe it would be better to consider it “primary”) blog… Something less about fatherhood and my family (specifically) and, broaden my horizons a little. Something that I can “identify” with (much like the “FOF” persona has been for me over the past 10 years) - and (as a bonus) something that I could incorporate with FOF.
I’m in no rush though… I have (at least) a year to think about it again before I have to worry about pondering new year resolutions all over again.